One thing I’ve been seeing pop up on social media is the phrase, “toxic masculinity.” My problem is that I think this reduces the underlying problem. There is nothing toxic about being a man, or a woman for that matter. The problem is being a belligerent ass. The problem is this, “if I’m winning you must be losing,” idea that runs like some cancer through our culture. Think about this whole left vs right, Democrats vs Republicans thing we have going. Tackling social issues is not a sport. There is no winning team and losing team. Yet here we are.
Toxic behavior taints many aspects of our culture and yet we seem to tolerate it with labels. Then when it blows up in our face we look for blame, we look for resolution, we even look for simple quick fix solutions, but never address the underlying problem. How we treat each other matters. It matters more if the person is a complete stranger.
Here is a tip from the library. The person across from you, behind the desk can solve 90% of your problems. (I surmise this applies in other places as well.) If that person doesn’t solve your problem you probably did ask him or her the right way. Just remember that.